What I Wore: Floral Baby Doll Dress
There’s nothing I love more than the 90’s. From the Rugrats to Surge to Skip-It, I’m a full blown 90’s girl. For that reason, I love this nineties inspired Zoe Grunge Dress from Living Doll LA. I paired this baby with my favorite kicks at the moment, black on black Chucks, and some sunnies from Francesca’s.
Until next time,
So I thought for a fleeting moment that you were different from them, that you were older, that you were serious, that you were true and genuine.
That you actually meant what you said, that you were going to do all you were saying, all that you were expressing and usually I’m skeptical, but for a moment I really wanted to believe with all my heart the words that were being verbalized, that it’s not just words. I wanted to live in those sweet nothings that was whispered to me and in those words that held so much depth and intimacy, I wanted that achingly.
I wanted to believe that you do want to live with me, have me wear your baggy flannels, lay on your lap and talk about everything and anything, submerge into delicious, unhealthy junk food as well as disregard any responsibilities, become absolute goof-balls and cherish the moment. I wanted to believe that I was the girl that was going to drive you wild, I wanted to believe that you wanted me solely, no matter what my size was and that I was beautiful in your eyes, that parts of my figure you adored to bits, I wanted to believe that you were going to treat me like royalty and truly put my interest first in any decision you take,that you’d pamper me as well, I wanted to believe that you wanted to lay with me during the night-time, hold me tightly in your arms, allow me to collapse entirely, and that you’d know all my dark corners and where my demons were. I wanted to believe that you chose me to travel with you far far away, that I was special, that I was the one to take care of you, give you the best company you’d ever have and bond on a profound level.
I wanted to believe that if I gave you all my support to you, that you’d fall for me, that you’d truly feel like I’m there for you and that I’m there to shelter you at your darkest hour, that I’d be the reason you’d smile, laugh loudly, make you happy or even the complete opposite, that I’d be your comfort when you get lost, messed up and utterly irrational.
It’s just a sham isn’t it? Because you’re just like the rest of them, void words and mangled promises, at the same time I knew within my depths that I shouldn’t have indulged in such a farce, but I truly wanted to believe, I truly wanted to believe that I’ll be yours, I truly wanted to believe that finally you were the one I’d recklessly fall for and vice versa.
But that’s just it, isn’t it? Make-believe. Something that will never be, something that will only be in cognition.
No longer will I be indulgent in this fiction.